What Is Self-Confidence and How Can You Build It?

Learn to understand and strengthen your confidence with simple, practical tips.

Self-confidence is your belief in your ability to succeed. It’s about trusting that you can handle challenges, solve problems, and reach your goals. When you feel confident, you’re more likely to try new things, take risks, and bounce back after failure.

Confidence isn’t something you either have or don’t have, it’s a skill that grows over time.

What Is the Signs of Self-Confidence?

Self-confidence isn’t the same in every situation. You might feel sure of yourself at work, but nervous in social settings, or the other way around. Recognizing the signs can help you understand where you stand and what areas you may want to work on.

Signs of High Self-Confidence

• You try new things, even if success isn’t guaranteed.
• You see mistakes as chances to learn and grow.
• You trust your abilities and express your thoughts freely.

Signs of Low Self-Confidence.

• You avoid challenges for fear of failure.
• You often doubt your skills or feel like you’re “not enough.”
• You stay quiet or hold back ideas to avoid being judged.

Confidence can grow over time. If low self-confidence is holding you back, therapy or self-help strategies can help you feel more secure and empowered.

Therapy Test – Can Therapy Help Build Your Confidence?

Do you struggle with self-doubt or fear of failure? Therapy can help you build stronger confidence and feel more secure in yourself. Our therapy test helps you see if therapy might be a good fit for you.

Answer a few questions to learn if therapy could help you handle your challenges and feel better about yourself. It only takes a couple of minutes.

Take the therapy test here.

Self-Esteem vs. Self-Confidence: What’s the Difference?

Self-confidence and self-esteem are closely connected, but they’re not the same.

• Self-confidence is about how much you trust your ability to do things or perform well.
• Self-esteem is about how you value yourself as a person, regardless of what you achieve.

Examples:

• Someone might feel confident at work (high self-confidence) but still feel “not good enough” deep down (low self-esteem).
• Another person might have a strong sense of self-worth (high self-esteem) but still feel unsure when trying something new (low self-confidence).

Why Do Some People Struggle With Confidence?

Confidence is shaped by experience and how we view ourselves. Here are some common causes of low self-confidence:

1. Past Negative Experiences.

If you’ve been criticized or told you’re “not good enough,” it can affect your belief in yourself. Failures, especially if you’re hard on yourself, can lead to self-doubt.

2. Comparing Yourself to Others.

Social media makes it easy to compare your life to others, often in unrealistic ways. You see others’ highlights but not their struggles, which can make you feel like you don’t measure up.

3. Perfectionism and High Standards.

If you always aim for perfection, it’s easy to feel like you’re falling short. Unrealistic goals can create constant pressure and a sense of failure.

Low confidence isn’t permanent. It can change with time, new experiences, and a more helpful way of thinking.

How to Build Self-Confidence.

Confidence grows when you take action and challenge old patterns. Try these 5 steps:

1. Challenge Negative Thoughts.

When you think “I can’t do this,” ask: “What evidence do I have that I can?” You might be more capable than you think.

2. Start Small.

Step outside your comfort zone in small ways. Try speaking in a meeting, starting a new hobby, or setting a goal you know you can reach.

3. Track Your Progress.

Take a few minutes each day to write down something you did well – even small wins count. Over time, you’ll start to see how far you’ve come.

4. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others.

Everyone’s journey is different. Focus on your own growth instead of measuring yourself against others.

5. Embrace Mistakes as Part of Learning.

Failure doesn’t mean you’re not good enough. It means you’re trying. Each time you try something new, you’re building confidence, no matter the result.

When Should You Seek Help?

If low confidence is holding you back or making you feel unhappy, therapy can help.

Signs that professional support might be helpful:

• You avoid challenges or new opportunities because you’re afraid to fail.
• You often feel unsure of yourself, even when others see your strengths.
• You struggle to accept compliments or feel proud of your efforts.
• Low confidence is affecting your daily life, job, or relationships.

A therapist can help you understand what’s behind your lack of confidence and give you tools to rebuild it step by step.