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How to Overcome Social Anxiety: Practical Tips.
Social anxiety can make everyday situations feel overwhelming. Maybe you feel your heart race when you have to introduce yourself in a group, or you avoid speaking up in conversations because you’re afraid of saying the wrong thing. Even simple tasks, like ordering food at a restaurant or making a phone call, might make you nervous. If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many people struggle with social anxiety, but the good news is that there are ways to manage and overcome it.
Social anxiety isn’t just shyness. It’s a deep fear of being judged, embarrassed, or rejected by others. This fear can make social situations stressful, even when there’s no real danger. You might replay conversations, worrying that you said something wrong. You might avoid social gatherings because they feel too exhausting. While these feelings can be difficult, social anxiety doesn’t have to control your life.
Assess Your Anxiety with the GAD-7 Test.
Before diving into strategies for managing social anxiety, it’s helpful to first take a moment to assess how much anxiety might be affecting your everyday life.
The GAD-7 is a quick, self-assessment test designed to help you assess your anxiety levels. It consists of seven simple questions about your feelings of nervousness, worry, and anxiety over the past two weeks. Based on your answers, you’ll receive a score ranging from mild to severe anxiety. Developed by doctors and widely used in healthcare, this test is a great tool for understanding your mental health.
It only takes a few minutes to complete, and it could help you gain clarity on your anxiety level and guide you toward the next steps, including whether it’s time to seek professional support.
Start Small and Build Confidence.
Overcoming social anxiety doesn’t mean forcing yourself into overwhelming situations right away. It’s about taking small steps that help you build confidence over time. If starting a conversation with a stranger feels too intimidating, begin with something simpler, like making eye contact with people as you walk by. A small smile or a brief “hello” to a neighbour can be the first step toward feeling more at ease.
As you get comfortable, try pushing yourself a little more. Maybe that means asking a cashier how their day is going or joining a casual conversation at work. With each small step, you prove to yourself that you can handle social interactions, and over time, your confidence will grow.
Challenge Negative Thoughts.
Social anxiety often comes with a stream of negative thoughts. You might think, “Everyone is judging me,” or “I’ll embarrass myself.” These thoughts feel real at the moment, but they are often exaggerated or untrue. Most people aren’t paying as much attention to you as you think—they’re focused on their own lives and worries.
One way to manage these thoughts is by challenging them. The next time you catch yourself thinking, “I’m terrible at conversations,” ask yourself if that’s true. Have you ever had a good conversation before? Has anyone ever told you they enjoy talking to you? Replacing negative thoughts with more balanced ones—like, “I might feel nervous, but I can still have a good conversation”—can help ease anxiety over time.
Use Breathing Techniques to Stay Calm.
When you feel anxious, your body reacts. Your heart beats faster, your muscles tense up, and it might feel like you can’t catch your breath. This is your body’s way of responding to stress, but there are ways to calm yourself down in the moment.
One simple method is deep breathing. Try inhaling slowly through your nose for four seconds, holding your breath for four seconds, and then exhaling slowly through your mouth for four seconds. Repeat this a few times, and you may notice yourself feeling more relaxed.
Practising deep breathing regularly can train your body to stay calm in social situations, making it easier to manage anxiety when it arises.
Prepare for Social Situations
If you often feel anxious before social events, preparing ahead of time can make a big difference. Think about some topics you can bring up in conversation, like hobbies, current events, or shared interests. If you struggle with small talk, having a few go-to questions, such as “What’s the best book you’ve read lately?” or “What do you like to do for fun?”—can help you feel more confident in starting conversations.
It can also help to remind yourself that you don’t have to be perfect. Everyone has awkward moments, and most people are more forgiving than you think. Instead of pressuring yourself to say the perfect thing, focus on being present and engaged in the conversation.
Step Out of Your Comfort Zone.
The more you avoid social situations, the more powerful your anxiety becomes. It might feel safer to stay in your comfort zone, but in the long run, avoidance only makes social anxiety worse. The key is to challenge yourself in small but meaningful ways.
- If talking to a stranger feels overwhelming, start by speaking up more in familiar settings, like with friends or family.
- If large gatherings make you nervous, try attending smaller events first. Each time you push yourself just a little, you build resilience and make social situations feel less intimidating.
- It’s okay if you feel uncomfortable at first, that’s a normal part of growth.
- What matters is that you keep trying, even if it’s just one small step at a time.
Take Care of Your Well-Being.
Your mental and physical health are closely connected. When you take care of your body, you’re also helping your mind. Simple habits like getting enough sleep, eating well, and exercising can make a big difference in managing social anxiety.
- Regular exercise, for example, releases endorphins, chemicals in your brain that help you feel happier and more relaxed. Even a short walk or some stretching can help reduce stress.
- Getting enough sleep is also important because exhaustion can make anxiety feel even worse.
- It’s also helpful to find activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Whether it’s reading, listening to music, or spending time in nature, doing things that make you happy can help balance out feelings of anxiety.
How Therapy Can Help.
Sometimes, managing social anxiety on your own can feel overwhelming. If your anxiety is affecting your daily life – making it hard to go to work, school, or maintain relationships—therapy might be a good option.
At Meela, we understand how challenging social anxiety can be. That’s why we connect people with qualified therapists who specialize in anxiety and other mental health concerns. We offer both in-person and online therapy, giving you the flexibility to choose what works best for you. Whether you prefer the comfort of speaking with a therapist from home or the personal connection of face-to-face sessions, support is available.
Therapy can help you:
- Understand the root of your anxiety
- Learn coping strategies to manage anxious thoughts
- Practice social skills in a supportive environment
- Build confidence in social situations
Read more about anxiety.
High-functioning Anxiety: signs and symptoms
Long-term effects of chronic stress
The difference between Panic Attacks and Anxiety Attacks
Morning Anxiety: Why it happens and how to feel better
How sleep affects your mental health
Understanding stress reactions in the body
Therapy Myths
Do I Need Therapy? Signs It Might Be Time
When Does Couples Therapy Make Sense?
What Is High-Functioning Anxiety and How Does It Feel?
The Difference Between a Psychologist and a Psychotherapist?
What Is Therapy and How Can It Help You?
How Therapy Can Help Manage Stress
How Therapy Helps with Depression
How to Find the Right Therapist for You
What is CBT, and Is It Right for Me?
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